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ALWAYS BELIEVE... LOVE IS BEAUTIFUL
Story of my relationship in my 19 year of living
In my sec sch life. When everybody is having and experience some love from some1, but i choose nt to find. The main reason because i was so badly hurt during my primary school days...
I was so seriously in love with a gal but in the end the girl seem to have fall in love with other guys too. The only reason is not that, Everythings is voices out by her, she choose to break with me, but in the end told me to patch back again. This break patch sequence repeat for a few times. And sometime she ask for a break is because she feel that she having quarrel with my 'bro' so don't want me to have difficulty facing him. That point of time my reply was... Why? So wat if u have quarrel with him? We are we, him is him... So the break up landed me feeling so sad... In the end i ask for a break up....
Through my secondary school life, i met so many good friend. All are as mad as me... They teaches me to take things openly, hack care, open minded, talk without even thinking and all.. So glad i have meet such ppl in my life... i take 3 years to fully overcome we it. During that time She was one of the girl i love most but hatred most too... I never had a chance to let her explain anything too. when she call me, i reject her called...
But during my sec 3 life, i fully understand.. There are seldom truth love. In the world not many is a good girl. But when i take things openly i started to think, maybe i was not the only 1 who was hurt, maybe the girl also? So when i saw her sometime in sembawangs i actually called her and talk to her. Slowly slowly we are back to normal friends...
In my sembawang sec life... When almost everyone have gone in the relationship b4 but i nv. Some ask me why? Some say why my expectation so high? But they nv know, what i want from a girl is not her pretty face, cute or good figure. What i want was that a beauty that lied inside her hearted. A beauty that seldom guys will see... Seriouly no such person came across in my life in my sec school life. Cause i know a person with a good care will sure care for me, love me, tresure me, don allow me to get hurt...
But not to mention, during my N n O level days i want to concentrate on studies too.
After my O level, i went out to work. Met someone who i find cute and was later attracted. Although i was attracted but i never have put any feeling with her. But, this girl came too close to me. She grab my hand when walking on the streets, she lied on my shoulder when watching movie etc... So i was slowly thinking was this girl falling in love with me? so should i gave myself a chance to give her a chance. When i started to have some feeling with him... But she goes oversea for a 2 week holiday, after she came back.. She patch back with her ex- bf, Without even telling me or what... She can be that close to me? Another "Bitch" i asked myself that time...
But till now, i don't know the reason did she even fall in love me b4 anot...
During my poly life... I met this girl. She sure can help me overcome all my fear i would get in my sec school life. I knew that this girl was the girl which can goes with me for a long time.
With her, i feel so being love.
But of course, during the first 10 month was a teribble period for her too. All the love i gave turn to a rope, all the care i gave turn into a cage. She was suffering... And i did not know... How stupid i am... Once after the 2 month i slowly realise how to love someone, how to forgive and forget in relationship. I try so hard to makes "love" to be more fairer. I love her, know what she wants and gave her... but...
AFter all, i treat my family and my love as the same level. As ppl say " qin ren mei you ge ye chuo" [no overnite quarrel] So for me, i never get too angry with her too, sometime i was just acting for a sake of my ego. After all the qurrael i nv put it to hearted. I forget about it. But for other its may be a different case, that was all blame to my useless assumption... Stupid! "Zhi yi wei shi"
Why? Everytime when i choose not to love, lost faith in love, love find me... When i started to really love, love left me.....
What a long post i have today... Indeed a good guys don live long.. " My sem sec couseller pass aways"...
written at.11:37 AM